Lead Yourself First

Are you waiting for your manager to give you direction? I hope not. Waiting is a lousy career strategy.

I recently sat down with Katherine Von Jan, the founder of Tough Day, for a podcast conversation about self-leadership. If you’re looking for insights on how to take charge of your career, you can watch or listen to our full discussion here.

During our chat, I shared insights about my journey: from a 10-year-old with a paper route to the CEO of a digital agency and founder of Equipt Women Co.

What surfaced in our conversation is something I wish I’d learned much earlier: Before we can effectively lead others, we must first learn to lead ourselves.

So, what does it mean to lead yourself?

Here’s my take on that term:

Self-leadership means taking responsibility for who you are, your actions and behaviors, who you want to become, and where you want to go. It’s about being the driver of your life and being intentional about your choices.

Unfortunately, this concept isn’t widely taught. Many people get promoted because they’re good at their jobs, suddenly finding themselves responsible for others without any leadership training. They’re expected to figure it out along the way. (Sigh.)

How can you accelerate your learning curve and lead yourself?

Here are four essential self-leadership tips that can transform your career trajectory.

4 Tips to Lead Yourself

1. Take initiative instead of waiting

One of my early bosses told me, “Kelly, you’re like water. You see the cracks and flow to fill them.” This was (mostly) a compliment about my ability to identify problems and take action without being asked.

Taking initiative—seeing what needs to be done and doing it—is a cornerstone of self-leadership. It demonstrates reliability, problem-solving skills, and a commitment to the organization’s success.

However, there’s an important balance to strike: don’t just become the office firefighter. If you’re constantly putting out emergencies, you might miss opportunities for strategic growth that align with your career goals.

Action step: Look for one problem this week that nobody is solving. Develop a thoughtful solution and present it to your manager: “I’ve noticed X challenge. Here’s my suggestion for addressing it.”

2. Make clear requests

Many professionals, especially women, wait and hope to be noticed rather than directly asking for what they need. This rarely works.

Instead:

• Get clear about what you want
• Declare it to the right people
• Ask for the path to achieving it

For example: “I would like to have more visibility with senior leadership to grow my communication skills and demonstrate my understanding of the business. Can we discuss opportunities for me to present at the next quarterly review?“

Action step: Identify one thing you’ve been “hoping” would happen in your career. Turn that hope into a clear request and schedule time with your manager to discuss it.

3. Understand your workplace context

To be effective, you need to align your work with company priorities:

• What is the company’s strategic vision?
• What are your department’s top objectives?
• How does your role contribute to these larger goals?

If this information isn’t provided, proactively seek it out: “This is what I understand our department’s priorities to be. Am I on the right track? Based on these, I plan to focus on X, Y, and Z.”

Understanding this context helps you prioritize effectively and demonstrate how your work contributes to the company’s priorities.

Action step: Schedule 15 minutes with your manager to confirm the top 3 priorities for your role this quarter and how they connect to broader company goals.

4. Know and use your strengths

True self-leadership begins with self-awareness. A strength isn’t just something you’re good at; it’s an activity you enjoy and that energizes you. If it drains you, it’s not truly a strength.

My sister was once a project manager and consistently received praise for her skills. How did she feel about project management? “I hate this so much. It drains me.” That’s not a strength. That’s a competency draining energy rather than giving it.

Focus on activities that:

• You enjoy and look forward to doing
• Energize you when you do them

When you use your true strengths 60-70% of the time, you’ll find yourself more engaged, productive, and likely to advance.

Action step: List three activities at work that both energize you AND you excel at. These are your true strengths. How can you advocate for more opportunities to use them?

Self-leadership isn’t about having all the answers; it’s about taking responsibility for finding them.

When you take initiative, make clear requests, understand the bigger picture, and play to your strengths, you’re not just doing your job. You’re leading yourself toward the career and life you want.

You are equipt to be a self-leader,

Kelly